Fortune Favors The Bold

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Jennjamin Franklin
Jul 22
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meanplastic:

me about to do a powerpoint presentation

meanplastic:

me about to do a powerpoint presentation

(Source: bitchyblackbarbie, via thesheertruth)

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omgstopembarrassingyourself:

cubbyzissou:

Gonna reblog this every Tuesday.

I keep thinking “next Tuesday is going to be the Tuesday that I’ll finally be sick of seeing this on my dash” and every Tuesday I discover that it is not that Tuesday.

(Source: hurwitzs)

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Another Fine Mature-Person Chat Conversation With My Wife

Carolyn:
Nom nom nom nom nom
(lick chops)

me:
slurp slurp slurp
MOW

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It’s that time of year-fantasy football

landrykilledaguy:

Let me know if you want in, and those of you who do, reblog this post. Not many followers since the restart and I want it to get around

Anyone want to trade me a top-20 RB for spare parts again?

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ha! that’s the spread on all pasta dishes with no meat, man. you should know this.

At least tomato sauce costs something to make. So then maybe the dish costs $3-4, if the ingredients are good (especially for fresh pasta made in-house, which is the level we’re at here). 

On the flipside, this is totally the spread for every single time you’ve ordered french toast, pancakes, or waffles at a diner. 

::Dos Equis Man Voice::

I don’t often order pancakes, but when I do I

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Today in New York City Hates You

The brand new Bar Primi serves a dish called “Breakfast Spaghetti” whose main ingredients are billed as a poached egg, kale, and spaghetti.

Price: $16.

EDIT: So sorry but there’s also pancetta involved. Surely not a pound’s worth (maybe 1oz?) But that’s another $1-ish right there.

Jul 21
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Any use of “make sure you have lots of tissues handy” to describe a sad Internet tab

Any use of “make sure you have lots of tissues handy” to describe a sad Internet tab

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"Hey guys! Look! The Simpsons!"

- FX’s strategy for audience engagement while they fuck up everything else they control

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Hemingway + cats

::jerk-off motion::

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(Source: eisfrei, via sonjackcarl)